An interview with the Jaded Monkey

1. If your life story could be told in ABBA songs, which three songs would you choose? Why? Does Your Mother Know? - because I get asked that question a lot.
Chiquitita - Tell me what's wrong.
I Have A Dream - because I do.



2. Name one fad that you took part in while growing up, which you would be embarrassed to admit.
Although I was always intensely fascinated by pop culture (and still am), I was never faddish. I was a little nerd and unless nerd chic was cool for a few minutes when I was growing up, I blinked and missed it. I did not own nor did I think I was 'cool' enough to wear any of the following: neon, Michael Jackson leather jackets with zippers, parachute pants, CHOOSE LIFE shirts, FRANKIE SAY RELAX shirts, short bolero jackets with the huge shoulder pads, eyeliner, legwarmers, pastel coloured suits with sockless loafers, cabbage patch kids, Simon the Music game. I didn't dress Mod, Goth, New Romantic, Punk, Breakdancer, Gino or any of prevailing styles. I did have major crushes on particularly delicious members of each clique though! I remember this one Mod boy. Hot dam! He was the most beautiful quasi-neo-Nazi wannabe I ever laid eyes on. There was also a breakdancing gino, a dark haired soft spoken lad who had the most incredible pair of legs. Then there was this Goth boy; artistic, dark and mysterious and prettier than Siousxie Sioux! (Alas, I digress)
I will admit to wanting a 'Flock of Seagulls' haircut though! hahaha That's a bit embarrassing.


3. If I were to give you a $1,000 Gift Card at Walmart what would you buy with it?
I've never shopped at WalMart, believe it or not. I'm sort of anti-WalMart. They are outlets for an evil empire bent on destroying life in small towns all over North America. However, with a prevailing guilty conscience, I'd probably stock up on soap or something. I don't really know. I might end up giving it away to some needy family.

4. If you could turn back time, what is one major life altering decision that you regret not making?
I'm thinking long and hard about this one (no sexual connotations intended). I'm having a hard time coming up with a decision that I regret. I tend not to dwell on the past and have always thought more about what I want to do going forward in terms of life altering decisions. I have few regrets other than missed opportunities at possible relationships. Those, I regret. There were a few guys along the way whom I could have gotten into a relationships with but chose instead to let them pass. I guess I will never know.

5. What makes The Jaded Monkey cry?
The pain and anguish of a broken heart.
The tragedy of life lost.
The sadness of separation.