Kindly dilemmas

Friday morning, like most weekday mornings began with my usual commute the office and my usual stop at the most covenient Starbucks or coffeshop for a tall coffee and a muffin or croissant. As I left the coffeeshop, a familiar homeless person confronted me and asked me for a quarter to buy a cup of coffee because she was very cold and hungry. I offerred her the coffee and muffin that I had in my hands but she didn't want either. She said that she can't go into that shop to have it and would rather some change so that she could go to another place where they would let her inside. And so I reached into my pocket, glanced sympathetically at her strung out face and handed her a twoonie. She was obviously strung out and homeless due to drug addiction. I felt saddened and wanted to help her as best as I could. I half believed that she just wanted to go someplace else where they would let her sit inside but the skeptic in me knew that she was probably aching more for her next hit than for some food and warmth. Whatever it is that she used that twoonie for, it meant a lot more to her than it means to me. I probably would have spent it on something useless or bad for me anyway.
I don't mind giving money to homeless people sometimes even though that I know that most of the time the money goes towards illicit substances. It isn't so difficult for me to have a bit of sympathy every once in a while. I do find it hard sometimes to be sympathic towards able-bodied young people living on the street. I know that there is a lot of emotional, physical or psychological trauma that causes them to choose to live like that but I find it hard to be sympathetic knowing that there are many other people who have two or three crappy jobs and struggle to survive. To me, there is more nobility in a struggling single mother, a new immigrant or refugee with no familial support who works long and very difficult hours for very small wages so that they aren't on the street begging for money. I resolve my dilemma by giving change selectively to only people who appear really desparate.

The dilemmas on this odd day didn't stop there.

Later that morning, I was faced with another dilemma of a different kind.

Someone who used to work with me and my small team is getting married some time this year. Up came the suggestion that we give her something 'personal' by chipping in and buying her something on top of the 'company gift' that she would be due to receive. Personally, I'm not particularly fond of the person getting married but I can tolerate her as a coworker. It wasn't my intention to buy her anything for her wedding but now that the suggestion came up and both my boss and my other coworker thought it was a good idea to get her something, I felt a bit pressured to oblige. With some trepidation, I declined to participate. When it became apparent that I was not happy at all with the suggestion, I explained to my coworker that I was not happy with the presumption that I would have participated and would prefer it if the question of whether I would want to get a gift (or chip in) were asked of me first.

It might seem scrooge-like but I really dont care to give gifts to people that I don't really like and are not close to me.

I try to be kind most of the time but I guess I'm selective.

Careful what you wish for!

I'm finding it most amusing now that Vince Carter and the NJ Nets are in the playoffs and playing like a man possessed. Thanks to Rob Babcock and the blockbuster trade that 'netted' my dear Raptors a couple of big benchwarmers (including one that was voiceably unenthused about having to leave his son for the Great White North), one disgruntled big man who just wanted to sent on his way to warmer climes and a big fat paycheck and a couple of other pie in the sky prospects.
Isn't if funny how the press and so called Raptors fans were all calling for Vince to be traded long before all of this happened? Last summer, Vince then openly confirms that he wanted a fresh start and yet that only made them even more upset. What do you want? Do you want him to stay or do you want him out of here? Everyone got their wish, Vince was traded and the Raptors are no better off. Sounds like a case of 'careful what you wish for' to me!
It's doubly amusing to see both Zo and Vince playing against each other like some major fire has been lit under their asses.
I still like Vince and understand his desire a fresh start. I don't think I would have wanted to play for a city or organization that doesn't want you around and aren't happy to have you left. Everyone knew that he would have to play like the superstar he is if he were repair his tarnished reputation. That's exactly what he did and what he is continuing to do right now.
Sigh, doesn't it say a LOT that all the former Raptors' stars (Vince, TMac, AD, Camby, etc.) are all playing well and in the playoffs? MLSE only cares about hockey and blew their big chance to build up the Raptors while no one is playing hockey. I don't think it's all necessarily on Babcock's shoulders but probably much higher up than him (Peddie? Tannenbaum?).

Molson buys Creemore

A sad day indeed. Molson (now owned by Coors) has taken over my favourite microbrewery.

Creemore is the maker of Ontario's finest microbrew and a favourite beer of mine for as long as I can remember. I've been drinking their unique lager since the time it was only available on tap at select bars and pubs and I have remained a loyal customer over the years. Now that the evil empire has bought them out, I have to think twice about drinking it and that makes me mad! Sigh, how can Coors, the makers of the most insipid excuse for beer, the fizzy piss known as Coors Light and an evil Nazi conglomerate empire have the crafter of the finest golden hued brew in their clutches?. I don't like having a conflict of conscience when I buy my favourite beer and now I do! DAMMIT!!

What makes Creemore so good?
Using only 4 natural ingredients (Malted Barley, Hops, Creemore's own natural spring water and Yeast), the amber lager is made fresh weekly and shipped immediately. The results are spectacular. The lager goes down with a velvety smoothness and richness of flavour that is unmatched. The slightly dark amber colour erupts in full nutty fresh flavour on your palate.
There is nothing quite as good as a fresh pint of Creemore, chitchatting with some co-workers/friends and munching on some greasy goodness at my favourite pubs. (The Duke of Richmond being a personal fave)

What makes Coors so evil?
1) As previously mentioned, the insipid fizzy piss excuse for beer called Coors Light that seems to be a favourite among Asian youth. I have yet to figure out why its so popular, maybe its the phallic advertising ('silver bullet'), maybe the flavourless fizz "it doesn't taste like beer" appeals to the unsophisticated palate more accustomed to Slurpees and Coca-Cola, I don't know.
2) The Coors family has well documented connections to the ultra right wing, Christian fundamentalist groups, neo- Nazis and anti-environmental think tanks. They are definitely not the beer company for the socially conscious.
Coors supports anti-gay groups.
Coors pollutes and are against Greenpeace.
Joe Coors founded The Heritage Foundation, a right wing think tank.


So now I am left with a crisis of conscience. I already stopped drinking Molson Dry because of the Coors take-over. Now I have to give up my favourite beer too!?!?! sigh...
Alternatively, I could just continue to drink Creemore whilst simply counting it among my guilty pleasures. I wonder if that's a worthwhile compromise?

Photobucket vs. Hello from Picasa

ACK!

I cant seem to get either Hello or Photobucket to load pictures on to my blog!

Help!

Hello claims that i should be able to automatically upload on to Blogger. It doesnt work, and I have no idea why!?!?! grrrr...!

I have this nice pic of Mariah too.... sigh...

Photobucket

This is a test post from Photobucket.com

The Anticipation of The Emancipation

I've had Mariah stuck in my head for weeks now and so yesterday I excitedly marched up to HMV (forsaking all thoughts of going to the gym) to browse around and buy some CDs. It was a slightly chilly evening but sunny. I walked up Yonge past the square where people got shot a couple of days ago and ducked in to the store, my musical mecca. I spend way too long in that store sometimes.
Browsing through the new layout of the store (CDs and DVDs are all mixed up now) I discovered that I'm way out of touch with 'alternative' music. I could barely identify any of those groups and found myself diverted towards the Pop, Jazz and Classical sections. The second floor has an entire section for punk and metal. Some angry sounding white boy was screaming out of the speakers out there. I now truly understand that "Music for some is noise to others". I found myself quickly heading up one more floor to the quieter confines of classical and jazz section. I discovered some nice sounding "popera" (my term for popularized opera a la Andrea Bocelli, Sarah Brightman, etc.) as well was some good jazz vocals. Some standouts: Jazz - Madeleine Peyroux and Jane Monteith, Popera - Il Divo (4 young hot looking Latin tenors...ohhh baby! Cant wait for April 19th when that CD goes on sale). k.d. lang's Hymns from north of the 49th Parallel is also fantastic.
I've added those to my shopping list for the next time I am in there.

Mariah - The Emancipation of Mimi
I hadn't been this excited over the release of a new CD in a long time. After months of anticipation and excitement, my favourite diva released The Emancipation of Mimi yesterday. Thanks to FlipBoyTO and Willariah for keeping the countdown going and reminding me when it went on sale, not to mention the wonders of the bootlegging and the internet to give me a preview. (BTW, if any secret music police are reading this blog, no one mentioned in this blog or the author himself is responsible for circulating pre-release copies!)
A few days ago, I was awoken to the sweet sounds of the second single "We Belong Together" and since then its been stuck in my head. I think it's been permanently wired into my subconscious since I heard the song in a not fully awoken state. That song is so damn good. It tells of heartache and builds to a crescendo towards the end sending shivers through my entire body and nearly bringing me to tears. Not since Alicia Keys' piano tinkling to "You don't Know My Name" has a song had such effect.
Emancipation sees Mariah moving forward with the best elements of her previous work. She does what she does best, which is wrenching every bit of emotion she can out of all 8 octaves. She even does the dog whistle! Ahhhhhhh! You can bet that Mariah has found a permanent spot in my CD player. I think will last me well through the summer.

Other CDs bought - Jack Johnson - In Between Dreams, Michael Buble - It's Time.

Of feeding tubes and JP II

As 1 billion Catholics around the world mourn the passing of their great leader, Il Papa, His Holiness John Paul II, I can't help but think what a sad few weeks have passed.

First there was Terry Shiavo and her lifeless body staring blankly across the TV screens. Her involuntary blinking was the only indication of brain activity. I think of how sad it was to see all of these people trying to decide her fate. The way I see it is that Terry stopped being Terry a long time ago and what remained was a vessel of organic tissue. I, sure has heck, wouldn't want to remain in such a "vegetative state". I think Buddhists have it correct in the realization that the body is merely a vessel for the transient spirit.
The saddest part was not the fact that this poor woman was terminally ill but rather because she was being used in such a manner; as poster person for the euthanasia debate. Right-to-lifers declaring her 'saintly' by her existence when we don't really know anything about her (by all accounts, a good and decent person... But not sure about 'saintly'), good ole G-Dubya making his laughable claims about care for the dignity of human life (tell that your dead soldiers and to the Iraqis, Mr. Bush!), religious freaks super-imposed Terry's picture onto one of a praying Christ. All of this taking place precisely around Easter when Christians think most about life, death and the resurrection. We will never know if Terry would have approved or wanted to become so famous in her illness and death. I just couldn't help but think, every time I saw her, "let her rest in peace, please!".

As for John Paul II, I have very mixed feelings towards his passing. He was such a powerful figure in the world for most of my life and the only Pope I've ever really known. I will leave the eulogizing of the Pope as statesman to those who are much better at it than I am. He meant a lot to many many people in the world and that's hardly a bad thing. The strength of his convictions and the way he led his church for the past 26 years never wavered. Some proclaimed it 'beautiful' to see him suffering and struggling with all his remaining physical strength to utter a word or two in blessing. I saw many things in the dying Pope, a stubborn old man who refused to acknowledge his physical weaknesses and I saw a man, symbolically propped up by an archaic institution as a demonstration of 'strength'. I saw a great man who lived an extraordinary life to his dying moments and that is nothing to be sad about.

In my mind and my own spiritual convictions, I have had a deep relationship with the man. In childhood and adolescence, I sought refuge and guidance in the teachings of his church. I admired his moral 'uprightness', his charisma, his piety and his leadership. I was intensely passionate about some things he preached about and equally scornful of others. I still remember the brief moments that he passed in front of me in the Popemobile some 21 years ago, warmly smiling and waving. In adulthood, I learned more of the world and I came to realize that his church had no place for homo like me. I could not believe that a loving God and His church would create me and condemn me to damnation. I disagreed with the Church's (and therefore the Pope's) stance on homosexuality, on the role of women, on celibacy, the use of condoms, and on many issues of a moral nature. My disillusionment soon turned to rejection. I no longer consider myself Catholic. The world is full of other ideas and teachings. One cannot be selectively Catholic, you either believe it all or you don't. It's in the prayers and declarations, if you don't believe me. Still, John Paul's legacy remains deeply within my psyche.

I do not grieve of his passing. He was an old man whose time had come. I do not celebrate either. I am thankful for his presence in the world. He taught me many things about God, religion and gave me many things to reject as well. His legacy will loom for years to come.

Adieu, John Paul II!